Book Club Day: Raising My Rainbow by Lori Duron

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Raising My Rainbow by Lori Duron

Parenting is not an easy job, but what happens when your son loves to wear dresses and plays with toys marketed for girls? Lori Duron encounters this and much more with her youngest son, CJ. In Raising My Rainbow: Adventures in Raising a Fabulous, Gender Creative Son, Duron shares her discovery about CJ’s gender non-conformity and how her family accepts him for who he is.

For today’s book club discussion, our members share their thoughts inspired by Raising My Rainbow. Check out their blog posts:

Order your copy of Raising My Rainbow by Lori Duron.  For more about Lori and her son, read her blog Raising My Rainbow. You can also follow her on Facebook and Twitter.

 

Comments

  1. Kim says:

    I have just started to read , “Raising my Rainbow” and I sit here crying because this is my son almost verbatim. My son is 5 and we are a family of three boys (he is a twin). My Rainbow and your CJ are going thru this together. Our families together thank you sooo much for putting it on paper I know our boys will have great fulfilled lives. Keep writing!

  2. Meagan says:

    I love your story!! I am a 22yr old girl from Texas who is a daycare worker(I have seen so many boys play with girl toys, wearing girl colors, and even preferring girly things over boy things, I see nothing wrong with it) I was watching The Doctors on my lunch break of Friday(which was yesterday)and heard your story. I wish I could go to school with your boys and be there to help them through this in their life’s, as friend/mentor, stand up for them. I think we should talk to the staff about their schools and really think about doing a whole lesson on being different, right from wrong and also bullying, it might help. Kids are really really mean, and all of my school years I’ve battled with being bisexual. These other children are being raised in what all society has taught their parents and in turn what the parents have taught them, that also goes with religion and Bible. I mean don’t get me wrong those are strong views and they are raising them good, except for this is the new 21st century and there’s differences now. People need to wake up and smell the coffee, No longer is it bad to want to be a supporter of LGBT, or to be one yourself, also to love God. We shouldn’t not be afraid to speak what you feel and or to feel what you feel. We can all have our own views and ways of life, but we shouldn’t not judge one another for speaking freely, and wanting to be who they are. I love how you both are raising your children, it’s the way I really wish everyone would! During my school years, I had no idea that I was even bisexual or what it really was, but in elementary we really don’t even know much about love/sexuality/and or we didn’t really know anything about other families except for “mommy and daddy” only. I started noticing that I was attracted to the personalities, and all of the other things that come with the same sex. I knew it was wrong in my head, and in sixth grade it really didn’t matter that it was wrong, all that mattered to me was living each day to the fullest and concentrating on my school work. Not to mention making my family happy. My grandparents are very very conservators and very big on our religion. My grandfather would be happy for me no matter what as would my father, and one of my aunts is gay herself and has been with her partner for years. As for my mom, I got tired of hiding it and thought, “this is my mom, I can tell her whatever I want and she will love me no matter what I say” well, when I told her it was another story. She isn’t happy nor does she accept it at all. My grandmother on the other hand I know doesn’t accept it but, I haven’t told her nor do I ever plan on it. I fear telling her. She’s seen things on my Facebook and she lets me know exactly how she feels esp. about the gay community. She says, exactly what those other children tell your boys. It makes me want to just break down and start crying because I am so hurt by what she says. Recently I have been battling with the fact that wether or not God will love me or not if I am really Bisexual. Some people question me because they don’t understand how I can be bi when I haven’t been sexually active, I tell them it’s not about being active it’s about being free, and loving the same sex and living with them for the rest of your lives sharing everything that’s yours and sharing how you feel for that person. I hurts to think that people can be so hurtful and so rude to not even think about having or feeling that your family, and I also the rest of the LBGT community(okay to be gay). I mean I seriously think that most of the world today has no idea who they really are, or who they want to be. Everyone is so afraid of what people think or how they act. Which is why we are taught to be ourselves and that each family is totally different, one has two moms, one may have two dads, one has two moms and one dad….etc…no just because of divorce/marriage/death/adoption/ect..but because of love! I have spent my whole life hiding half of myself in front of my happy nor does she accept it at all. My grandmother on the other hand is a whole different story, I fear telling her and I do not think I could ever tell her. She’s seen things on my Facebook and she lets me know exactly how she feels esp. about the gay community. She says exactly what those other children tell your boys. It makes me want to just break down and start crying because I am so hurt by what she says. Recently I have been battling with the fact that wether or not God will love me or not if I am really Bisexual. Some people question me because they don’t understand how I can be bi when I haven’t been sexually active, I tell them it’s not about being active it’s about being free, and loving the same sex and living with them for the rest of your lives sharing everything that’s yours and sharing how you feel for that person. I hurts to think that people can be so hurtful and so rude to not even think about having or feeling that your family, and I also the rest of the LBGT community(okay to be gay). I mean I seriously think that most of the world today has no idea who they really are, or who they want to be. Everyone is so afraid of what people think or how they act. Which is why we are taught to be ourselves and that each family is totally different, one has two moms, one may have two dads, one has two moms and one dad….etc…no just because of divorce/marriage/death/adoption/ect..but because of love! I have spent my whole life hiding half of myself in front of my family & friends because I am scared of what they will think of me or what the will do. I also have become a member of society who thinks and who has a brain that is trained as we grow to think like this. I love my family and also I love making people happy. I’m a huge people pleaser. I have many friends that do accept me, so does my father. On the same page I have others who do not approve. I have fought with one friend of mine on the thought of going to hell because the way I think or live. My gay aunt says the Bible was written so many years ago, and by more then just God, and plus if we are thinking and trying to figure out life(your two sons, you both, and the rest of the LGBT community)the way we are and want to be, then why would God do this to us and have our life’s planed out, why would he let us deal with this questions and hate if we were going to hell and we aren’t supposed to? That’s the question I have asked myself everyday I wake up, everyday I have time to think about it. I mean why would he let us like girl clothes if we are boys and like boys if we are boys, if he didn’t love us and we weren’t supposed to? It’s just always been so confusing to me. The Bible may say that a woman should only be with a man, but he’s not going to send us to hell if we don’t agree with that or if we live our lives the way we do. He says if we believe, trust in him, and we accept him inside our hearts he will forgive us of our sins, so that we may live eternal life. Not meaning to preach or make this comment any longer then it really is, but everyone should be able to express theirselves and live free. I’ve been picked on for who I am, or what I like, I really think everyone has in one day of their life’s. Everywhere you go in your life there’s going to be a person who isn’t going to like you or who you are, and they will let you know that quickly. It’s just how the world is, but we must teach the children of today that it is okay to be you and to like what you like, God won’t punish us for that either, only for sinning and judging, making fun and not loving one another. Your not alone and will never be. Thought out my life I have wanted to teach others esp schools and children that it’s okay to love and to think what you want, there’s always going to be haters and lovers. I was lucky to have a group/clique that were gay/LGBT/weird/emo/different and all through school there are cliques. Maybe not the elementary but the grades after sixth do. I always hung out with the groups of people my teachers told me not to, which were the gays, emos, different people, and the rejects that nobody would hang out with. I was always that odd new students friend from the start I would always try to be there making them feel comfortable and laugh, as I said I enjoy pleasing people. That doesn’t mean I’m perfect, I was just always that weird nerdy gay, cutter, emo, dark persons friend, because I was taught to love tht neighbor, and to treat others as you want to be treated. I gave everyone a chance, and when I saw someone alone I went over to be there with them so they wouldn’t be alone. I knew how it felt to be alone, sometimes I feel like I am now being Bi, and working with thousands of females who talk about their man and there relationships…then I come home to my family and I still have to be alone because all through life I felt as if nobody understood me but God. Being different being gay I tried my best making the best out of life. If someone told my baby boy he had a girl backpack I would say you know what that’s what you think, but I love it and it’s all mine, so idky your so worried about it. Or just tell them thanks I love it, and walk off don’t worry about what others say just because your different and you have pink pencils that doesn’t mean your a girl or that they are for girls only. Tell that person they have nothing better to do but waste time on making fun of me that you have lost out on getting to know the person I am. Every kid is going to judge, every child, it comes natural, no matter what. If you have green shoes, blue hair they are gonna say something. They are out in that campus just as anxious and nervous as the child they are picking on, to make them feel better and make their day okay they will make fun. I will pray for your boys and your family, also that school they go to, because your story is a huge inspiration to me and now I know that I am not alone. Don’t ever think that there is nobody and don’t be so sad because you don’t have somewhere to go. I’m always here if you would like to or if you need to talk. This world may not seem kind but there is someone out there who will be kind. Your boys are so smart, and they both are so strong! You can tell by reading the web and hearing your story that they will go so far in the world. There are so many others out there who can’t express their feelings and who aren’t allowed to with the city/family they live in. They are alone, and they think they are worthless, so they cut everything and everyone out and become so sad.

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  1. [...] discussion about a book and how it relates to their lives and in turn, everyone’s lives.  Click here to read how nearly two dozen bloggers reacted to my book. Share [...]

  2. [...] Raising My Rainbow by Lori Duron as she shares her journey raising a gender creative son. Join From Left to Write on September 5 as we discuss Raising My Rainbow.  As a member, I received a copy of the book for [...]

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